Graduation Sensation

by Feng Shui Police

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01:52
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03:22
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01:59
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02:16
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03:40
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03:36
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about

In the Spring of 2017 I came to realize that the ivy league degree I was about to receive didn't mean a damn thing. So during spring break, while my now former bandmates frolicked in the tropics, I hunkered down in my parent's basement and made this record.

I hope you had fun, getting your college degree. And if you didn't — well, you didn't miss too much.

credits

released May 26, 2017

An album by Dash Elhauge.
Album art by Sam Lessing and Dash Elhauge.
Released through 75OrLessRecords.

"Thanks for the nightmares, Nietzche" written by Dash Elhauge, Evan Harris and Friedrich Nietzsche.
All other songs written by Dash Elhauge.

"College Degree", "Thanks for the nightmares, Nietzche" and "Cliché" performed by Dash Elhauge and Evan Harris.
All other songs performed alone by Dash Elhauge.

Recorded and mixed by Dash Elhauge — as always, in his parents' basement.

tags

license

all rights reserved

about

Feng Shui Police Providence, Rhode Island

FREE THE FENG SHUI

Contact for booking. Barmitzvahs preferred. Exceptions negotiable.

fengshuipolice at gmail.com

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Track Name: Lecture Hall
I was lonely in the lecture hall
I'm sorry dude I can't recall at all

Well was it hard sleeping warm
With nothing else to do
To play with your snooze alarms
All your assignments overdue
And know I can't stop falling in love
With you

I was lonely in my freshman fall
Now I can't believe you're so banal

Count every day I stayed inside
With my roommate's alcohol
Missed every test so you could hide
And make a teary call
I guess you can't help falling in love
At all

I've been taking tests all my life
(Wow that's cool, bro)
Wanna volunteer don't have the time
(Wow that's tough, yo)
Didn't even get much sleep last night
(Wow that's cool bro)
Everyone you know is going to die
(Wow that's rough, yoooo)

I was leaving at the end of the song
The yuppy's going on and on and on

I know it's wrong to think of me
The way I never thought of you
If you're feeling incomplete
It's just that I never knew
That I can't stop falling in love
I can't stop falling in love
Oh I can't stop falling in love
With you
Track Name: The Shit
I'm so tired
I'm so tired
I'm so tired of waiting

Everyone is
Everyone is
Everyone is lazy

All the kids
With startup shifts
Are talking about craft beer

Got my diploma
In a coma
Tell me how I got here

And I'm always falling apart
And I really oughta give up
And I'm always falling apart
And I think I'm gonna throw up

If that's the shit that gets you going
Go ahead and just run with it
You could spend your whole life floating
Why not try and make more of it?

I'm so sick of
You're so sick of
I'm so sick of trying

I don't need to
You don't need to
Everyone is lying

Some guys love it
I say fuck it
Give me my degree please

Graduation
Masturbation
All come from the same need

And I'm always falling apart
And I really oughta give up
And I'm afraid I'm gonna grow up
And I think I'm gonna throw up

If that's the shit that makes you angry
You'll just have to get over it
Move to Cali make more money than me
Do I look like I give two shits

No one told you that you had to go on grinding hard and working so long
No one told you you'd be qualified for any of the salaried jobs

In fact they said quite the opposite
They kept talking about how it's such a tough market
Track Name: Let Go
Let go
Darling won't you let go
I'm begging you to let go
Oh no

Tell me
Tell me something honey
Are you ever gonna let go
Oh no

I've been so alone for so long darling
Nothing's helped by holding on

Now I'm
Stuck in lecture
I think of you
And all your letters

You know you
You got me going
When you broke me
I started smoking

I wanna call but now I'm speechless
My phone is broke I'm left in pieces

Let go
Tell me when you let go
Oh darling won't you let go
Oh no
Track Name: Cliché
You won't let me write you a song
Cause you think it's cliché
You said, "come on, please don't"
But I keep thinking of you each day

Well I hope that it's ok
That I did it anyway
It gets worse
"I love you more each day"

You won't let me write you a song
Cause you think it's cliché
You said, "come on stop now
I gotta write this essay"

We've both read too many books
I know how stupid this must look
I just hope
You'll forgive me some day

Is there something I can do
To convince you that I love you
If words don't mean a thing
Do you care about my stories

When you're gone I'll feel alright
'Cause I tried, I tried, I tried
I'd tell you everything
If I thought it'd make you fine

I like drinking coffee with you
And your freezing cold toes
I wake up scared every day
Now I've got something to lose

And I hope that it's ok
But when you're gone away
Well you know what

I'll think of you each day
I'll think of you each day
I know it's cliché
But I'll think of you each and every day
Track Name: Mom and Dad
Mom and dad
I'm having such a good time at college
All the kids here are cool
And everyone said I'm gonna love it

I'm not feeling stressed at all
And my hopes have not deeply rotted
The WiFi here is so good
I look up bands on Wikipedia in my dorm room

But every time I wake up
I feel like
I've been sleeping alone
Sleeping alone

And every time I go out
I wonder
How I'll fair on my own
Without a home

Mom and dad
I'm having such a good time at college
They teach me how not to think
While your account incurs major lossage

We all go out and we drink
Then we come back and we drink some more stuff
Then we throw up in the sink
This is all that I've ever wanted
Track Name: I Bet That's Cool
All my
Friends in college
Nod their heads like
They all got it

But I can't
Help but think that
They don't know a
God damn think yet

And all the while they spoke I thought
"Oh man, I bet that's cool"
"Oh man, I bet that's cool"

Oh man, I bet that's cool
Did you break down all the rules
The way I always did at school
The way I knew you'd want me to

But every time that I said hey
I felt like I couldn't stay
Every time that I said no
I felt like I couldn't grow (so I wanted you to go)

All the
Time at parties
While everyone
Spins around me

Can't help
Think about you
While they're dancing
In the rear view

And all the while they spoke I thought
"Oh man, I bet that's cool"
"Oh man, I bet that's cool"
"Oh man, I bet that's..."

I think I wanted you to leave me
I think I wanted you to leave me
I think I wanted you to leave me
I think I wanted you to leave me....
Track Name: Toe Tag
Lying on a gurney at my college reunion
My lips are blue and the line's not moving
The provost gives a speech above how far we've come
He pauses for applause
And I run into someone

"Where have you been?
What have you been up to?
You were a lot less dead
When I last saw you
And you had that girlfriend, right?
She was was pretty cute and happy and nice"

And I know you know
That I want you too
And I know you know
That I need you too
And I know you know
That I love you too
And I know you know
This gets better and better so

Whatever happened to that guy?
He was always hanging out with that girl with purple hair and I
Kind of liked his art I guess
But I coulda told he was leaving
That's my toe tag

Gathered in a circle looking at my body
"Honey did you try some of the biscotti?"
"No, I didn't dear, but come right here
This young man on the ground is paralyzed with fear"

"Why?" says the woman as she took a bite
"Doesn't he know he's in the prime of his life"
"He's got no direction and he hates his classes
He never gets to sleep and now he's lost his glasses"

Whatever happened to that guy?
He was always hanging out with that girl with purple hair and I
Kind of liked his art I guess
But I coulda told he was going to nowhere

Whatever happened to that guy?
Was his life so hard or did he just not have a plan
A little bit of both, I guess
He fell in love too fast
That's my toe tag
Track Name: College Degree
Well I hope you had fun
Getting your college degree
And I hope you find someone
But as for me

I'll be living at my parents' house
Trying to pay the rent
Always talking about leaving
And sticking to the basement

So strip your gown off
Toss your cap
Go tramping on the main green grass
Pretend this feeling's meant to last

Well I hope you had fun
Getting your college degree
And I hope you find a job
But as for me

I'll be stuck at home waiting
For you to get your shit together
Everyone you know's been blabbering on
Like some English major

I'll be singing
Na na na na na na nananannanananaanaaananananaanan...